Frequently asked questions
I am concerned about privacy and discretion. How do I know I can trust you?
You don't really...trust is always a leap of faith, and something that is never guaranteed. I always advocate discernment, and a weighing of risk/reward. For me, I need certain real world information to make sure the safety of myself, my family, and my established clients are all protected. You may feel similar... I understand if the risk of sharing your identity is too great, but that will not change my own safety and privacy needs.
UPDATED: If I book longer time, do we have to go out in public?
That depends... I understand that discretion is important to many, and that public meetings may cause concern. Understand that I have just as many concerns about public outings, and never look to draw unwanted attention. My nature is friendly and warm, but also *conservative* regarding attire and behavior in most public settings. I believe in blending in, and do so quite well be that at a formal affair, dinner at a finer restaurant, or a nostolgic dive bar. I dress to fit the social occasion, and to compliment my companions.
Extended sessions are offered as a way to explore a variety of experiences, and cultivate various types of energy in order to get a better understanding of who you are as a whole person. Staying in the same space for multiple hours limits the possibilities of that energy being accessible. That is not to say we cannot create a wonderful private picnic en suite, and situations like this is where compatibility really counts...
Please also note that the generosity of my package offerings are, in part, due to the expectation that longer sessions are including a combination of public time, and other expenses you might incur as a part of those escapades. Rates for extended private meetings may vary from my standard package options.
UPDATE FOR COVID-19: Contact me to discuss options for activities that are reduced risk for COVID exposure, such as picnics outside, a hike or bike ride at the park, outdoor cafes with strong safety protoocols, kayaking on the river and more!
What if I am only interested in one part of your service...can I get a discounted rate?
I understand that many are on a buget, and would love to see me only for select services...
This is not how I operate. I am a total package, not a menu of services. When you meet with me, you get all of my skills being brought to the table, with nothing held back. This is the only way I know how to operate, and is why I only work with select clients.
The exception to this is my remote coaching options. While these are not in-person sessions, they do offer those who are outside the area, or not within reach budget wise, the opportunity for coaching & mentoring.
Otherwise when we meet, expect to get my full set of skills at your disposal!
I am interested in exploring something, but want to make sure it doesn't offend you. How should I approach this?
Thank you to those who are mindful of this! The thing to always remember is that anything that sounds like there is an inquiry or expectation for sexual contact, arousal or gratification will cause our communications to end immediately, any plans to be cancelled, and deposits forfeited.
After you have submitted your screening information and we have schedule a time to meet, you may send me links to content that interests you in order to get an idea of conversation we might explore when we meet.
No agendas or expectations should be attached to sharing that information-it's simply informative and a way it helps me get to know you better. Our time together will always be unique, never scripted (unless we roleplay). xoxo
If you approach things in this manner, you will be hard pressed to offend me about anything you might want to discuss...
UPDATED: Will you travel with me if we have never met before?
In most instances yes. What type of encounter I agree to has more to do with our initial phone conversation, but the option is on the table for new clients to schedule up to a weekend trip. I only offer longer travel dates, or travel outside the country, for well established friends.
COVID-19 UPDATE: I am not currently seeing new clients during the pandemic, nor am I offering fly-me-to-you for ANY client right now. I hope to resume these options in the near future.
UPDATED: My wife/gf is bi-curious, but I don't want her to know you are a professional consultant. Can we pretend I met you through a dating app?
Absolutely NOT. This is not ethical, and is not fair to your partner.
If you feel like you can approach the idea of couple's exploration with me, you can include the benefits of hiring a professional to help guide you together in this pursuit, and how it reduces stress and drama when you seek a professional service.
I always talk to partners before agreeing to meet to assure compatiblility, comfort, and to answer any questions or concerns they might have. Again, phone conversations also help break the ice...especially so in these instances!
UPDATE for COVID-19: I am not seeing any new clients until further notice, and this would include new couples. I welcome continuting to stay connected to established couples I have already met, who also share similar practices for COVID risk reduction.
UPDATED: Can you bring another professional with you to our meeting?
I understand how some are seeking FULL immersion in an experience, and how having additional energy and variety helps us push beyond normal limits... These are amazing experiences when we can have them!
I absolutely have other KNOWN and TRUSTED colleagues that I collaborate with, and after screeing and our phone consultation, can give you some recommendations on who else you might contact to join us (based on your interests and location).
I do not operate as a booking service, and cannot make direct arrangements for third parties to join our meeting. All arrangements and negotiations are SEPARATE and INDIVIDUAL. Any questions, concerns and financial payments for other parties are to be made by you, directly to them.
I do not work with anyone I have not met before. If you wish for me to join you with another professional companion for an outing, please send me their information so that I may try and coordinate meeting them in person in order to assess compatible working styles and personalities.
DUE TO COVID-19: I am only collaborating with a *small* handful of known friends for in-person meetings. Please
contact me direct to discuss your interest and options more.
UPDATED: Will you take me to a lifestyle club or event with you?
Due to COVID-19: I am not currently attending lifestyle clubs or events, either in my personal life, or as a tour guide in a professional sense. Believe me, I am VERY disappointed about this, but feel it is best to avoid higher risk situations.
See more about my personal protocols & risk reduction standards during COVID-19
UPDATED: Why a 2 hour minimum?
Because there is no way to relax and settle in, and fully explore our time together with any less time... In most instance, 2 hours is never enough time for full exploration, but I am trying to keep myself within a somewhat reasonable reach for those who are drawn to me.
My mindset is not the same as other types of service out there. There is nothing wrong with them, or those that seek those outlets...we each are in different places in the world, with varying needs. What is most important is that we all are finding those that match our own mindset, not trying to force anyone to believe our way is better. The best way is always the way that feels right to YOU! There may be a time when you feel different, but until then, honor what is working just fine for you.
Regarding my mindset: I'm not here to give a quick fix based on a set agenda, all of which is to be accomplished in under 60 minutes. That is not how I roll... In part because I don't believe that is how we really get to know each other...nor does it allow the space or time required for growth, or evolution... Deep, authentic connection takes time. In 60 minutes, the focus is on giving you what you want and need, not creating a mutual exchange.
We have to make time and space for certain things to get the air and light required to blossom...they cannot be rushed, or dictated to happen. Each person is unique. Every time I meet someone new, we create a unique energy that is meant to be viewed and honored as a special connection. As such, I want to give it time to unfold... This is why my service, overall, is geared towards longer sessions. This is one way we honor that time fully, and to the best of our abilities...to not rush it.
I realize some want to believe you can have all this in an hour, or that both time and money can limit the ability for longer sessions as well... My advice to those of you is to always keep doing what works for you!
But for those who have been doing that, and now are looking for more...perhaps it's time to try and new dance, and a new tempo...
UPDATE for COVID-19: since it is more difficult for some clients to find time to get away when working from home, I am temporarily offering one hour sessions as an option in my local area only. Since I am only seeing established clients at the moment, we will already have foundations we have built in past sessions to work with, even under shorter time constraints.
Are deposits really required? What if you rip me off?
Yes, deposits are really required, even from established clients. This is non-negotiable.
I only take a few appointments per week, so do not have time for cancellations. I invest time and energy in making arrangments, and money in securing a meeting location based on your preference and convenience. Deposits give me peace of mind that my efforts will not be taken for granted, and make sure you carve out the appropriate time for our meeting in your schedule.
Of course things come up...and as long as you are cancelling within 72 hours, the deposit can be refunded or applied to a reschedule at a later date.
And if *I* had to cancel, for any reason, I give the option of refunding the deposit, or applying it to a rescheduled meeting. If it's something last minute, I would also offer some other concession...more time, or a discount on the agreed upon rate.
If you are concerned about me ripping you off? You should not book with me... Anyone who takes the time to fully research me, and who has interacted with me, should get a sense of who I am... If you don't feel that I can be trusted after all that, listen to your instincts! I'm not here to convince you otherwise...
Where can I find more photos of you?
Since privacy and discretion is important to me, I have reduced the amount of photos I share on my website and social media outlets. Please sign up for my newsletter, and select "candid photos" for weekly updates from my photo collection not published publicly. Please note that I do not share full face photos if we have not met, nor are any of these images graphic in nature. The images are meant to inspire, to be sure...and show more of my artistic and creative side that you will also experience a greater taste of during my sessions.
When will you be in my city next?
This is, by far, the question I get most often. The short answer: when you book me.
I don't tour. I operate more exclusively, and only see one client per day-usually 1 or 2 clients per week. I go where I am needed, when I am needed, for sincere requests. I do not need other appointments to guarnatee a visit, nor do I try and see anyone else when I travel to a particular area. I prefer to give my full attention to the individual meeting, making any time & location arrangments around your needs. This, to me, is true personalized service.
My 2 hour minimum will bring me to any area in or around Chicago, or to any city in Ohio, Michigan or Indiana.
Fly-me-to-you available for clock-free/overnight immersions + airfare.
Do you offer professional Domination services?
I do not provide Domination as a straight service. If I choose to explore power exchange, in any form, it is only after we have an established relationship where such things are an organic part of the growth you seek, and our path together.
We *may* explore and dip toes into fantasy scenes...negotiated & structured for specific amounts of time & activity, but this is a different dynamic than D/s as I view it. Those scenes are used as springboards to deeper undertanding of self, and would have purpose beyond surface fulfillment.
Some understand this difference, but if you don't, one way to learn is by re-starting at the beginning. I can help w/ that too...if you are willing to actually start there yourself.
New clients who approach me as a submissive are rejected as a reflex... I do not offer performative roles of Dominance on demand, and only give this energy to those who seek to evolve, grow and understand themselves better in that pursuit.
NEW: Has your service changed? Your website has different information than in the past and I'm not sure you are still offerening the type of service I seek?
Yes, my website is always changing and updating, just like my service. Those who have known me for years know that I am constantly updating to keep my approach fresh and reflect current times. That being said, some of the legal shifts re: censorship of certain content in 2019 had me update much of how I market online, both on my website as well as all of my public social media accounts. Discretion and privacy are very important to me, and to many I spend time with, and I hope my website conveys that.
But no, I would not say my service is exactly the same...I think it's actually BETTER, and continues to evolve and expand!
Yes, I have all of the
basic foundations I started with, but
continue to add knowledge and skills that I think enhance what I do, and give my clients better options to pursue their needs
beyond the surface. These are skills I have at the ready, as needed, but are not forced upon anyone.
I believe in meeting people where they are at, and letting them tell me where they want to go.
Hopefully this all makes sense, but if you wish to share a more direct conversation before deciding if you would like to meet,
feel free to drop me a email with a *polite* inquiry about your interests
(rude & graphic emails are ignored). I also offer
free phone consultations with every new client before I get the deposit for our appointment, just to make sure we are aligned in our interests, expectations, and goals. If I don't think my service is what you seek or want, I will politely explain why in hopes this helps you gain clarity with other choices you make.