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  • Writer's pictureDaphne Dixon

Balancing Masculine & Feminine

What is masculine?  What is feminine?

As we evolve into a world that pushes the boundaries of gender identity, the characteristics and archetypes are dissolving…  But what do they leave in their wake?


Our biology has assigned us a gendered body (not to be confused with how one identifies mentally & emotionally…), but each of us are made up of a unique mix of masculine and feminine qualities.  To what degree these are equal, or pull us in one direction over the other, varies, and this has many factors.

Hormones-the mix & flux of hormones vary in each person, as well as each type of gendered body.

Culture-where we live, who we are surrounded by, and pervasive cultural norms influence our experience of what “masculine” and “feminine” means, and how those traits are demonstrated.

Upbringing-the messages we are given about gender roles is heavy shaped by how we are raised. Because those relationships are closer, they usually have more weight and play a bigger role in our ideas about masculine and feminine than culture & society.  Although some families may support and bolster pervasive cultural ideals, others may actively attempt to deconstruct them in an attempt to prevent limiting gender roles being programmed as the norm.

Experience/environment-experiences we have (where we live, work, travel, who we maintain friendships with, and who date & share intimacy with ) can support early messages, challenge them, or expand them over the course of our lifetime.

Evolution, actualization, and choice– as experiences and our surroundings give us information, it can create a more active engagement in our energies. As we gain knowledge, we apply new ways of thinking about ourselves and others.  We may evolve to break down or break through limiting social messages about gender roles, and consciously adopt the traits we wish to have more of in our life. We may also choose to suppress certain qualities we want to soften or quell.  

To feel balanced and whole, we need energy around us that balances and compliments our true nature (our authentic spirit within).  Taking into consideration what masculine and feminine qualities we embody is essential in that role.  If we don’t first consider our own energy, we won’t fully understand how we attract or detract others into our personal space.


For instance: those with an imbalanced feminine energy, who caretake (feminine energy) as an expression of love, may overexert themselves because of the void of love they might crave for themselves.  They may attract those who are selfish and take without reciprocating (and expression of unbalanced masculine energy).  Since what we put out comes back to us, imbalanced energy can attract other imbalanced energy.  I know we may feel that giving is a way to invite love back to us, but if we are not balanced in why we give (is it with longing and expectation for reciprocation? or done without attachment on the return?), or understand the necessity of boundaries and reciprocation to make those exchanges balanced and even, we set ourselves up for possible disappointment or failure by attracting energy that might be the *mirror opposite* to us.   In this we are attracting “like”, but that similarity is not the same as what we may want it to be.

Energies that reside within us all-not gender dependent

Also, if we don’t understand the difference in biology, and learn how to work with our natural states, finding balance in our interactions and relationships will be more challenging. The chemicals in male bodies operate differently than they do in female bodies.  How we process and interact with the world differs as a result. Connecting doesn’t mean we have to interact with the world or feel things the same, but rather it’s about finding ways for balancing and complimenting each other, allowing each of our own energy and its own space.

The current manifestation of our energy may or may not be congruent with our true nature, so an essential component to finding the deeper balance and stability we crave rests on our ability to uncover, embrace and actualize our authentic self, and then balance and stabilize it with the energies we surround ourselves with.  Each person is fluid in those energies and influences over the course of our lifetime, and influenced by our experiences and interactions, as well as natural shifts of our physical form. What is true today may not be true tomorrow-which can be confusing when connections break down.  It’s important to check in periodically to note how and why these things shift, and as we do so, we will gain a greater awareness to our being as a whole, and the duel energies that are always alive within.  We can harness those energies consciously to create the lives we want.

In love and light,

Daphne <3

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